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November 19, 2014

Misconceptions Of A Long Distance Relationship.

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The first thing people ask me when I tell them my boyfriend lives in Spain and I live in Brazil is : Buuut.. how do you guys do it ? You must reeeeally trust him !

I really do trust him a lot but I don't understand why people feel like just because we're living in different countries right now it means that I need to trust him more than I would trust a theoretical boyfriend that would live in the same neighborhood as me. Because girls.. If a guy wants to cheat on you, he will. It doesn't matter if you live in the same house or in different continents.

I've only been dating Sebastian for a year now and you guys would not believe the amount of judgment I've got in the beginning from my "friends" and a couple of family members. Even my dad thought it was a little weird at first (and I don't blame him) but after we showed him we were serious he kinda thought it was pretty awesome that we were mature enough to know how to deal with this and how to plan a future together. 

But anyway.. Given this whole "story of my life" speech I just gave you I thought it would be fun to share a couple of questions and remarks people have made about our relationship that could not more wrong or even pretty weird. 

Someone Is Cheating

And usually people tell me this implying that I'm the one being cheated on because if anyone is going to be played in the relationship is the girl, right ? Hell NO. I honestly believe that some people just don't use their brains. Why only the boy would cheat ? Why the girl is always the innocent ? And most importantly : Why someone has to cheat ? 

We are already dealing with the distance and keeping a commitment to each other because we love each other and don't want to be with anyone else right now. We are not just playing around and spending large amounts of money to see each other just because we don't have anything to do. 

And also, the moment we stop loving and not wanting to be in the relationship anymore I trust him and the trusts me to put an end to it. So why would we ADULTS cheat ? It just doesn't make sense to me !

You're Gonna Miss Him So Much Will Be Depressed

Seriously ? I miss him everyday but I'm in this relationship because it makes me happy, so how can I be depressed ? I think some people forget that the moment a relationship is not being positive and it's making you cry more than it's making you laugh it's time to go. 

There's No Future

Another thing that sometimes people forget is that there's no point in being in a relationship if you don't see a future. If I'm still with him is because we not only see a future together but we're working towards that. When people say that to me I just want to scream : Hello, welcome to an adult relationship !

You Do Naughty Things On Skype

A friend of mine said that to me right around the time celebrity nudes were leaking. First I was shocked and second I could not stop laughing. I know a lot of people use their webcam for devious purposes but.. Why would you assume that I do that too ?

First of all, I wouldn't recommend recording private moments even for married couples. You may know your boyfriend/husband a lot and trust him with your life but you can't tell the future. You can't possible know what's going to happen a couple of years from now and a sex tape is perfect for revenge purposes. People can get crazy with jealously or a friend of him can perfectly be browsing around his computer/phone and find it.

In my humble opinion sex is something private that should be shared between two (or how many people you'd like - we don't judge) consenting adults inside four walls. I'm not saying that it's something sacred and you should marry a virgin, but it's important and you shouldn't treat it like a game. I don't know if I'm making sense, I hope I am. 

You Can't Know How He's Like In Real Life

Just because we Skype is not real life ? We speak every single day for at least one or two hours and we talk pretty much everything we did that day and what we will do the next one. How is this not real life ? 

Some people forget that we started this when we were both living in the some building so I know how he's like in "real life" and that's why I fell in love with him so this argument is completely ridiculous. 

We're Getting Married For Sure

As much as I love him and, like I said before, see a future with him I have no idea with we are getting married or not, anything can happen. When I'm talking about future and what we're going to do after college with my friends they all seem to be completely sure that I don't have to worry about anything because I'm going to marry Sebastian.. hahahahaa As much as I would like that very very much I don't have ring on my finger and no one got down on one knee so relax, people !

Are you in a long distance relationship ?
 Do you have any advice ? What do you think about it ?
Please leave me your thoughts on the comments, I really enjoy reading them and I respond to each and everyone of you amazing people.

So these are a couple of the questions that I need to put up with sometimes and I hope you guys found it at least entertaining. If you're currently dealing with those I did a post a couple of month ago about dealing with a long distance relationship and if you'd like to check it out you can click here !

Thank you so much for reading and I'll see you soon !

Letmecrossover_blog_long_distance_relationship_traveling_ldr_travel_tips_tricks_michele_mattos


7 comments:

  1. This is soooo true! I faced the same thing back in the days when hubby and I was doing the long distance thing (Canada/Malaysia) and sometimes I just want to scream and tell everyone to shut up. The relationship is stressful enough and the last thing I need is people nagging doubts into my ears. And you're right, if someone wants to cheat, the WILL CHEAT. You can be married to the person, sleeping side by side every night but if he/she wants to stray, they will.

    Reflection of Sanity

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    1. I have know idea you and your husband did the whole long distance thing.. I'm so happy to know you guys made it ! Thanks for sharing a little bit of your history ! :)

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  2. Oh the whole "well how do you know he's not cheating" use to bug me so much. Well if someone is going to cheat, they are going to cheat, regardless of the distance between couples. ahhh that use to annoy me.

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    1. Exactly, Rachel ! Some people really need to mind their own business ! :)

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  3. I really love this post. My boyfriend and I go to different univeristies so we are now about 2/3 hours away. Not quite as long distance as you but I still can't see him so often.
    I agree with everything you have said and I don't think that I could put it better myself! I do miss him a lot but skype is a total god send and chatting to him everyday makes me so happy.
    My advise would be to try and talk everyday about what you've been up to etc. And share pictures and send snapchats too becuase it's nice to see the other person. We also like to plan in advance when we are next going to see each other and what we are going to do. It gives us something to look forward to while we are apart :)
    Thank you for this beautiful post and for the comment on my blog xx
    http://penneychic.blogspot.co.uk/

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    1. Thank you for you comment, Katherine ! I love hearing stories like this.. it sucks that you guys are apart but it's just for a small period of your lives ! I wishing you all the best and lots of strength but it looks like you guys have pretty much everything figured out ! :)

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