May 24, 2016


I've recently finished reading Amy Poehler's book "Yes, Please" and I'm not exaggerating when I say this: it changed my life. Amy is my new spiritual animal. Soul sister. And whatever else kids are saying on the internet. I wasn't a very big fan of her before reading the book. I saw her occasionally on TV but since I was never a big fan of SNL or Parks and Recreation, I wasn't very familiar with her work or her life before she got famous.

Although I highly suggest picking up this book (especially the audiobook read by her), this is not going to be a book review. The entire book is awesome and extremely funny but today I decided to focus on something that she said and that it really resonated with me: Good for her, not for me.

I don't remember regarding to what exactly she said that, but when you think about it "good for her, not for me" is a pretty good motto to live by, specially in a world where it seems like everyone is trying to turn women against women. I strongly believe that if more people lived by this the world would be a much better place and we would have waaaaay less useless drama going around.

Can you imagine a world where instead of criticizing each other on our bodies, our hair, the way we dress, the way we raise our kids, the men we date or how many hours a day we work, we simply let it all go (all of it) and just say "good for her, not for me"? Can you imagine how much more united we would be? How stronger, happier and lighter we would feel without pointing the finger at each other?

The way other people choose to live their lives in not our concern. Shocking, right? I know I'm aiming for a more feminist approach here but this is good advice for everybody. I just feel like nowadays, specially with a bigger presence of social media in our lives, negativity and criticism between women has gone through the roof. If you don't believe me I suggest you go on YouTube and read the comments of ANY "beauty video". You can also go on instagram, twitter, facebook, it doesn't matter.. Negativity is everywhere online and off online and this is not good.

But what's more shocking (at least in my opinion) is the amount of hate and negativity in the online beauty community, which the bigger demographic are younger woman. I don't know why people feel like bringing other girls down is the way to go. If you've read The Secret you know this already but there's room for everybody on the top. There's absolutely no need or reason for you to waste your time and energy trying to bring other people down. Specially when you realize that even if you succeed and you menage to, with your comments, bring somebody down (which I doubt you would) it does not mean that you'll automatically go up.

Lorde already said girl, "we're on each others team". We've been put against each other for far too long and far too often. So, the next time you find yourself in a situation where you want to judge someone or you want to make a negative remark (believe me, that time will come) about what they are wearing or eating or doing, just hold it in, turn that negative into positive and let it all out with by just saying "good for her, not for me".

That's my message for today. If you're not already a feminist I hope you become one soon and if you're online bully or "hater" I hope you become a better person soon. The world is already a pretty ugly place, there's not need to spread negativity even further - if that was your goal consider it done and move on to better things. 

Any thoughts on this topic?

Thanks so much for reading and I'll talk you soon. 

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